So far I've put my laundry on, drank some water, watched some TV, read some news, updated this blog, and am not this-close to doing my WATP 1 miles DVD again, to try and get my mind off the fact that it wants food. I'm not particularly hungry and I'm not craving any one thing, I just keep having to stop myself from going to the supermarket so I can grab junk off the shelves. I want chocolate and pocky and doughnuts and GOD DAMMIT this is hard.
Thank God I'm in my pajamas (at 19:30, I know, shut up) so I'll have to actually get changed to walk there. In the past I've found myself in front of the store with no clear memory of the walk over, as it's only a couple of minutes walk away and is open 24 hours should you find your self on binge auto-pilot. Got a craving for ice-cream at 3 in the morning? Sure thing! Want to eat your weight in chocolate? Not a problem!
I think my mistake came from the white rice today. I made mango chicken and served it with rice, then left some rice in the rice cooker to take to work with me for lunch tomorrow. Then about 3 hours later I just dove in and ate it. Not good, but not disastrous. I decided to just count that as my dinner and call it even, not the best choice but never mind. Now though, I want to eat everything! I want to make a chicken salad for lunch tomorrow and I know if I do I'll just eat it.
Oh, and it's just started raining, so if I walk over there I'll get soaked too. I don't know at this point if that is enough to stop me.
Sunday, June 15, 2008